I have to confess something: the Queen wasn’t really very excited about blogging Drag Race. It was Bianca who convinced me to commit to it. And it was you Miss Things who made it one of the most rewarding experiences of my life.
I know that sounds very dramatic. But I am, after all, a sometimes flamboyant homosexual male.
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After the first season, I was afraid RuPaul was never going to get it right again. Until now.
In the Queen’s opinion, this season of Untucked was different than the past two, in that the focus was at least equally split between stereotypically bitchy queen behavior and a thoughtful exploration of Drag. Somewhere in between Jiggly and Phi Phi’s borderline schizophrenic and juvenile tirades; we also got some heartfelt discussions on bullying and acceptance of differences.
This was not an episode involving the latter.
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Okay.
Where do they find these dudes?
Do they cruise Target, and follow guys with kids in tow who surreptitiously steal glances down the Maybelline aisle, and stare longingly at the Jason Wu Women’s Collection?
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All right, before tonight’s episode, let’s remind ourselves why the other lady boys should have never gone to press…
You know what? The Queen is actually tired of talking about this episode. The dolls didn’t listen. So instead–let’s just give the future Drag Race contestants some ideas for NEXT season.
Click to see the Queen’s version of the cover girls
Let’s check up on the ladies in the Interior Illusions Lounge and find out what the men in mascara are up to, in what RuPaul hails as: “The most emotional ‘Untucked‘…EVER”
Bitch is so fierce, she can cry with product placement
So the safe girls once again got to leave the stage. Miss Ru MUST be reading my posts, since she let the girls have it before they left. I am really loving RuPaul this season. She really does have that FBQ quotient back in SPADES.
Three Girls and a Cocktail
Anyway, Jiggly attempted an apology. Maybe it’s a little of the 30 year old coming through at last. However Latrice was not really having it. Although I’ve got to agree with commentary that I’ve read on other sites: it really is a little hypocritical of Ms. Royale to be so up in arms about the girls being unprofessional.
Queen of Soul, or Queen of Sour?
From the Aretha impersonation to her behavior at the end of Snatch Game, she didn’t win any points for professionalism either. Speaking in the lounge Ms. Latrice said of Ru’s pronouncement about being safe: “For him it may not be cute, but it was music to my ears.” Well honey, with all due respect, if you want a shot at winning this thing then you better start paying attention to what is “cute” to the Supermodel of the World.
It really is wonderful to watch the younger queens like Jiggly pay such respect to the older divas like Latrice. That is one thing that I’ve noticed in the drag community–there really is a respect for the grande dames. It’s a faux matriarchal society that I wish were translated into the rest of the male gay culture. What a contradiction: older gay males are often made fun of; but old drag divas are often revered.
Entirely off-topic…and forgive me for being so slow, but the Queen has been wondering what was up with Latrice holding a pillow in front of her during the majority of Untucked episodes so far. 
I just figured out that Miss Thang strips out of her outfit the minute they get into the lounge. Now THAT is a Black Southern Woman for you: as soon as she gets home from church–off go the pumps and dress. Gotta love that. I just wonder how much time it takes for her to get back into it once she has to go back onstage?
Waxing on Willam
The conversation turned to Willam. Quoting Dida: “She (Willam) may be a bitch, but that bitch is sickening and smart.” Latrice: “…she may be the bitch and troublemaker, but that ho knows how to turn it out.” And of course the conversation had to turn to Willam’s shoe wardrobe.
It was nice to hear that some of the queens get Willam. Maybe Phi Phi does too, and she’s playing a brilliant game as well. I don’t think so though. I don’t think she gets the thought that goes behind such an elaborate strategy–the Hoffman and Day Lewis-like commitment to staying in character. It may not make you popular, but it sure will keep you in the game.
Classy Ladies
The entire segment in which the three safe girls sang the praises of the top three was fabulous. What a pleasure to hear colleagues mention positive things that their competition did during a challenge! Something in me dies when I see queens perpetuating stereotypes of the bitter bitch. Of course we can be bitter, of course our picture is in the dictionary under “bitchy.” But it’s very nice to see Drag Race working hard to show how supportive gay men can be as well.
The Girls Do Chekhov
And so, while the other lady boys are playing Charades in the Gold Lounge, the top and bottom (minds out of the gutter Miss Things) girls alternate between delusion and support.
I really want to be supportive of this child, but he makes it SO difficult. As someone who calls themselves an actor, he really doesn’t know how to “take the note.” His observational skills are abysmal. We’ll talk more about him in the rundown with the other girls. But watching him defend his actions in the lounge just made me sad. He’s getting all of this objective feedback, and he’s brushing it aside. As a director, I find it the hardest thing to work with actors who have blinders on regarding their abilities or where they are in their lives (See The Three Sisters).
Bianca and I were talking about one of Sharon’s Achilles heels in this competition: her inability to self-regulate. She’s mentioned it herself a time or two, but it really reared it’s Botoxed head on this episode. Unlike Phi Phi, we don’t think Ms. Needles says things with malice, but sometimes they come off pretty harsh. Watching Kenya react to Sharon’s words (assuming they were in sequence) was heartbreaking. As I said in my first post on this episode, it became abundantly clear that Kenya had been wrestling with this cultural divide all along. I’m sure that this was just the straw that broke the proverbial gay camel’s back.
But once again it gave us an opportunity to watch the girls support each other. 
I get that a large percentage of Reality Show viewers want to see contestants go for the throat. It’s just nice to see that RPDR has been listening to their fans and cutting down on the snark (are you listening Bunim/Murray?). It actually brings tears to my eyes to see and hear the divas speak well of their fellow lady boys. Just another thing that makes Sharon fierce.
Oh. And Phi Phi cried too.
Thoughts Miss Things?
So once again the Safe Girls find themselves in a place with an unlimited supply of liquor, hot lights, and nothing to do but gossip about each other. Sounds like my living room on a Friday night.
Let’s trash them discuss what happened.
Jailhouse Blues
So all the queens congratulate Ms. Latrice, and the first person to point out how much the judges and the other contestants appreciated her work was Willam. 
I wish all of the Willam haters would take a moment to see exchanges like that (“You was Bernie Mack in a dress–you was just fine”). He is often one of the first with an encouraging word for the other queens…at least the ones who deserve it. 
And Latrice feels slightly vindicated after the 18 months she spent in prison. The Queen used to work with inmates at the now defunct Lorton Reformatory in Lorton, Virginia. Once a month I would spend 8 hours with the residents in the Medium Security section of the facility. The men were phenomenal. Being in jail was hell. It was hard enough for me to be locked up for one day. I can’t imagine what kind of strength it took to survive for a year and a half. The lady boys also talk about the difference between Latrice’s drag and Madame LaQueer’s–something Bianca has mentioned as well. Bianca pointed out to me that even though Latrice is a big girl, she still pads and cinches to give herself a more feminine shape.
. That seems to go along with a mindset that Latrice has mentioned a few times. She is quite aware that they are all really men dressing up as women. Unlike, say, Carmen Carrera or Phi Phi who seem to conveniently forget that they have a penis. I don’t care how much you tuck or serve “realness”. the Wankie is still there. I love that Latrice sees Drag as an Art, and not as a way of working through (or NOT working through) whatever issues you have with being a male.
Sitcom Realness
S
o Jiggly is relieved that the team won. She was extremely worried that her performance put her at risk. Actually, she has a natural talent for comedy, and an ease with the camera that was quite engaging and appropriate. This brings up a point that bothered me about the taping of the sitcom in general, and Max Mutchnick in particular. 
I don’t know if RuPaul asked him to play the role of Bad Director, or if that particular job is not a strong suit of his. A good director, however, doesn’t tell you how to read a line–as he did with a few of the queens. A good director knows what to say to help an actor find the interpretation and the inflections that he would like them to have. While I was extremely disappointed with the way Willam and Sharon Needles responded to Mutchnick on the set (which I’ll get to in my next post), I was also put off by the way he managed the shoot. Kenya Michaels was an unintentional hoot–with Bianca pointing out that she wore more makeup to play a butch woman, than she does on the runway as a femme queen. 
Her inability to take the director’s notes further illuminates two things: she is in her own world, and the language barrier is the Big, Gay Spanish Pink Elephant in the room. There is only so much nodding and pretending you understand that you can do before it bites you in your pretty little girly ass.
Shameless Outlet Store Plug
So the Phi Phi/Sharon feud comes to a head, and a new catch-phrase is born. The Queen thinks there is enough blame to go around for this particular interaction. However, the thing about Phi Phi that eludes me is her inability to either see and/or accept that Sharon is much more than a one-dimensional performer (“Go back and do your only one look that you got!”) who is running circles around her. IMHO, that description fits Phi Phi MUCH more completely than Ms. Needles. Is it jealousy or stupidity? Sharon’s runway look: “Don’t come for me when you’re going to wear a glittered plastic Elvis wig onstage!” Did I miss something? DID THE BITCH NOT WIN THE CHALLENGE WITH THAT GLITTERED PLASTIC WIG??!! Granted, Phi Phi didn’t know that at the time, but I doubt seriously that it would have made a difference.
I swear that Latrice and I both said “You don’t play bitch–you just are one.” at the same time. 
The Queen loved Ms. Royale’s definition. And in most cases, when it comes to actual women, I think it is absolutely appropriate. This country still doesn’t know what to do with strong, independent women(see government panel on Contraception). However in terms of Ms. O’Hara, I think I have a better acronym:
What a jam-packed 21 minutes! From catch-phrases, to coming-out stories, to tucking. Honestly, this after-show is becoming as much fun as the race itself.
What about y’all? What did you think about the episode?
What the hell is going on? I’m getting too involved in this. The producers are actually telling a cohesive story! There is a through-line with each of the queens revealing character and motivation as the episodes progress, which advances the plot. It’s good reality television. WTF?
Gratuitous eye-candy and shameless objectification of men. Isn't it WONDERFUL?
Monday’s episode actually ventured into my realm of expertise: acting. Having been the Artistic Director of a theatre company for over a decade, the Queen has had many opportunities to cast, direct, write and manage a myriad of different types of productions. And though I try to be as objective as possible in most areas of my life involving people and situations, I find that I am a judgmental, opinionated bitch when it comes to actors and acting.
Beware me RPDR contestants.
I must admit: I was extremely impressed with the dolls in the mini-challenge. It was quite refreshing to see each of the lady boys embrace the premise and “get ugly.” Since that aspect of the competition is a bone of contention with the Queen regarding some of the contestants, it was nice to see everyone let go and have fun. Some of those bitches were jacked up
I thought Willam’s concept was brilliant. However, imho, there were other teams who had better photo shoots. Nevertheless, when he and Madame LaQueer were chosen I knew the writing was on the wall for one of them.
We’ll get to Milan and Willam in depth during my next DR post.
But I’m sure that all of us Reality Show Competition Veterans knew what was coming when the two of them started boasting about their prowess in the fields of acting and television respectively. And LORD does the Queen have a lot to say about both of them regarding their behavior and performances.
But for now, let us content ourselves with a hearty, and well-deserved Condragulations for Ms. Latrice Royale.
This bitch truly has the potential to go all the way. She knows what she’s doing, she does it well and she grows with each challenge. Big ol’ stereotypical role in this week’s setup. But she made it work. She brings energy and commitment to everything she does. What a statement it would make if a Big Queen could take the top prize. You GO Girl.
And it’s Sashay Away to Madame LaQueer.
I agree with Madame’s exit statement: there are definitely queens that should have gone before her *cough* Kenya Michaels *cough*. But I can’t disagree with her being off’d based on her choices and performance in the main challenge. Again, I think the subtle nuances of American culture are necessary to really get ahead in this game. If she could spend more time in the states absorbing pop culture from a purely native perspective, I think she could truly be somebody, be about something and–say it with me–Prance.
Good luck to you, you Pulchritudinous Puerto Rican Princess.
FBQ 