Cawfee Talk II

All right Miss Things.

Let’s gather in the Break Room. There’s a Supervisor’s Meeting today. We’ve got a couple of hours while they plan the meeting to talk about the plans for their next meeting.

Let’s discuss some fabulous, random, innocuous crap.

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

At least according to Charles Caleb Colton. So Project Runway should be extremely flattered by this show. The copy on the Fashion Star website reads in part: “NBC kicks off the new year with the new reality competition series “Fashion Star,” which will search for the next big brand in fashion. Featuring host and executive producer Elle Macpherson along with celebrity mentors Jessica Simpson, Nicole Richie and John Varvatos, the series will give 14 unknown designers the chance to win a multi-million dollar prize to launch their collections in three of America’s largest retailers: Macy’s, H&M and Saks Fifth Avenue.”


Comes complete with a male judge dressed all in black. Crack sold separately.

Apparently it also comes with dinner and a floor show.: “Each week, the show will begin with an exhilarating fashion show unlike anything seen before featuring musical performances, dancers and models in front of a studio audience.

I just wanna know if I get chips for the casino with every ticket.

The idea of the winning designer having her stuff go directly to retail is an interesting concept. I’d like to see how a commercial network handles this concept.

So should we discuss it here? Should I blog on it? If we think so, I of course reserve the right to bail if it turn out to be a steaming pile of Palomino Poop.

Whad’ya think?

A Strong Woman’s Achilles’ Heel

I was watching Body Heat last night.


He left this morning. I had to see you.

(kissing her)
I know.

I couldn’t call. I’m afraid to call.
I was afraid you wouldn’t let me come.

Yes, that’s right. You can’t call.
Never call. We have to be very
careful now about the phone. The
phone company keeps records.

I’m careful. I hated it, Ned. I
hated sitting there with the two of
you. I thought I was going to scream.

(distracted, thinking)
You did good.
(finds his thought)
You’ve called my apartment from the house.

No, never.

No? Those two times —

I went to phone booths. I’m afraid
of him, Ned. I’m always afraid.

That’s good. We have to be careful
about the phones now.

Why, Ned, why do you say this now?

(in his own thoughts)
We could account for a couple calls.
We’ve had some contact. That would
make sense.

Matty grasps his face in her hands and looks into his face.

Why, Ned? What’s happened?

Because we’re going to kill him. We
both know that.

Matty’s face looks different than we’ve seen it. There’s
a fire burning behind there and the heat it’s throwing is
bringing her equal portions of dread and relief. She
stares at him.

That’s what you want, isn’t it? We
knew it was coming. It’s the only
way we can get everything we want,
isn’t it?

Matty’s nod is barely perceptible.

The man’s gonna die for no reason
but we want him dead. He doesn’t deserve it.
Let’s not ever say that. We’re doing it for
us. And you’re going to inherit
half of everything he owns. That’s
what the will says, right?

Again, the tiny nod. He pulls her head close, so he
doesn’t have to look into her eyes anymore.

That’s it then. We’re gonna kill
him. And I think I know how.

From‘s Internet Movie Script Database

It’s easily in the list of my top favorite movies of all time. I am a big fan of Noir in both written and cinematic form (you ever want to read an awesome take on the genre–in which the main character happens to be gay–check out Joseph Hansen’s Dave Brandstetter series of novels). I love the concept in the World of Noir that even the purest angel has his hands dirty in some way.

Growing up in a family of females, I quickly learned that, in many ways, women are invincible. Not to romanticize, but my experience has been that women seem to be able to deal with just about anything. As messed up as the Queen thinks Matty Walker’s plan is, I am in awe and wonder of both the plan itself, and the execution of it. It takes a vagina of steel to seamlessly pull of every meticulous detail of such a complicated plot. And Matty does it with aplomb.

*THIS PART CONTAINS SPOILERS if you haven’t seen the movie. And if you haven’t seen the movie…WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!???*
Yet at the end, we see her on a beach, most likely pining for the love she gave away.

Now granted, the script was penned by a man, which always leaves me a little suspect in terms of accurate characterizations of women. But in this case I’m with Lawrence Kasdan’s conscious or unconscious take on women and love. I don’t get it.

All my life I’ve been in reverence of what women are capable of. I’ve been raised by females who “bring home the bacon AND fry it up in the pan.” They are autonomous entities who put most men to shame in their strength and ability to handle the toughest circumstances and not let it break them.

Except when it comes to affairs of the heart with men.

Why the hell do you let us fools get under your skin? Why can so many of us make you forget your steady course and lose your natural mind? Why isn’t the beach and that gorgeous boy-toy she’s sitting with enough for Matty? I DON’T GET IT!!!

‘Splain Please.

Crap! We’re out of coffee. Whose turn is it to order a new supply?


13 thoughts on “Cawfee Talk II

  1. Fashion Star, It’s going to be a train wreck. Get you popcorn ready. Of course, we should have a go at them. They are begging for our attention like hungry little puppies. I say we let ’em have it until they prove they aren’t worthy or we get bored. Which ever comes first.

    As for why women sometimes let men get the better of us, I think it comes down to the the essence of the human nature and not actually the male/female dynamic. Humans are not by nature solitary creatures, we crave human interaction and and bond in family structures. We want to share our lives with other people and those ties are incredibly difficult to cut even when relationships sour or end. Sometimes the hardest ties to cut are those most fraught because of the myriad of conflicting emotions that have accumulated.

    My favorite piece of advice to my young adult son is, “You don’t want to be THAT guy”. You’d be amazed how many times that one comes in handy.

    • I definitely agree with the idea that human bonding spans the genders. Even as a Myers-Briggs Introvert (which no one believes when they find out), I still crave human contact.
      What I don’t think I explain in the post very well is that I am specifically talking about relationships in the romantic realm. My sisters, and other female friends give GREAT advice to their girlfriends: “Girl, you need to dump that man NOW!!! Until he is about something and knows how to respect you, you need to MOVE ON!!!” Except it takes them forever to heed their own advice. In every other non-romantic relationship they have with men, they are strong, confident and capable. But with a man with whom they have chosen to be intimate, all bets are off. It’s fascinating to me.I know very few guys–straight or gay–who react similarly.

  2. After what NBC did with The Next Great Restaurant, I expect the train wreck julaine predicts. Musical numbers? Dancers? Great Holy Mary Mother of God, spare me.

    Of course I’ll watch it, and I’d love for you to cover it, Scotty. But I doubt anyone will be grumbling if you decide to bail on it.

    As for that other, bigger, question – Having made some really lousy romantic choices (and, in my defense, some good ones) before I stumbled upon the awesome, cute, hilarious man I’m now married to; and knowing many women who have made choices that were just as bad, or worse, I can still only speak for myself. I can put it down to insecurity, or naivete, or daddy issues, or wanting to save someone, but dammit, it was just plain old stupidity. That stupidity may have been due to insecurity, naivete, or daddy issues, but it doesn’t matter to me anymore. I was just stupid. I give myself no room for excuses. I’m a lot less hard on my sister-in-bad-romantic-choices than I am on myself.

    The other thing, though, is I’m an incurable romantic. I’ve always thought “maybe this guy is the one, and I won’t know if I don’t try”. Even after a man took a chunk of my heart and, 22 years later, still has it, I didn’t give up. Lucky for me, it was shortly after that when I did the aforementioned stumbling.

    All that to say, I’ll be damned if I know.

    I find it interesting that Body Heat is the movie that made you ask this question, Scotty, seeing has how (SPOILER, SPOILER, SPOILER)

    she got the best of him, not the other way around.

    • I’m really honored when you share your stories. That’s another thing about people in general, and women in particular that I’m in awe of.

      *SPOILER* (I love writing that–I don’t know why)

      Regarding the end of the movie (and why I wanted to hear a woman’s perspective on the subject), that’s exactly my poorly worded perplexity. She wins. She carries off an extremely complex plot with strength and precision…and gets AWAY with it. Yet our last shot of her shows her miserable. And I have to conclude that it’s because she is pining away for Ned–who is hardly the good guy in this piece.

      It brought up the countless experiences I’ve had with some of the most powerful people I’ve ever met who seem to be bested by this romance thing with men.

      • I haven’t watch Body Heat in several years. It’s dangerous to watch repeatedly in a short period of time. 🙂 SPOILER:

        I’d forgotten about how she looks in that final shot. I always thought she just looked bored, but boredom is just a step or two away from misery. So I can’t argue with your interpretation. And, seriously, it was pretty damn easy to corrupt Ned. Those two were made for each other. She probably considers him her soul mate (not that I believe in soul mates, but that’s not the point).

  3. Time for some shallow (since it’s getting a little heavy here)…..don’t know about y’all, but now, I cannot look at a photograph of Jessica Simpson now and NOT see Willam….and here we have Nicole Richie, The Body….and Willam–and some guy in black.

  4. Woman are still taught unfortunately to equate sex with love. The old standard woman have sex to gain intimacy and man give intimacy to gain sex in relationships is still a valid model when discussing the dynamics. It’s engrained and deeply reinforced in ways both
    subtle and blatant.

    I don’t like stereotypes but I have observed that men appear to be more analytical about when the benefit/cost ratio of relationship does not favor them they are quicker to walk away. Not that they don’t grieve or suffer, just that they are quicker to see when to jump.

    Women are supposed to be nurturers. Behavior that gets a man called experienced gets a woman called a host of much less flattering things so many excuse, accept and outright condone some really disgraceful behavior.

    • You speak the truth, julaine, especially in the last paragraph. Feminism’s Second Wave made lots of changes in the workplace and the home, but it seems there hasn’t been a whole lot of change when it comes to sex. I mean, being a single mother isn’t the stigma it used to be, women aren’t expected to stay virgins until they’re married, and we generally aren’t shamed in the public square anymore (unless you slip onto Limbaugh’s radar, and probably Santorum’s too), but women are still held to a different standard than men are when it comes to sex.

      As a Second Wave feminist (you can just call me “old lady” if you want to), I’m truly torn about women who have sex the way men are allowed to. On the one hand, I’m glad that women have fewer sexual hangups now, and that they have healthy sex lives. On the other hand, they’re still in danger of being considered a slut. I wish younger women, and teenagers especially, would think about that, even though I know it’s not fair and they shouldn’t have to. I don’t blame the women. I blame the ridiculous and deliberate narrow-mindedness that too many people indulge in.

      Anyway, I have a theory about what “slut” means. “Slut” is what someone calls a woman who’s had sex with one person more than the finger-pointer has.

  5. Re: Fashion Star. If you’re up to blogging it I’d love to read about it. Not that I’ll be watching, but reading what other people have to say about bad TV is delightfully entertaining. [As is reading what other people have to say about good TV, but it’s not the same.]

    Re: romance. Part of it is, I think, what juliaine said about the sex=intimacy thing that gets drilled into us womanfolk from the cradle. Even I, as someone who has absolutely zero interest in anything even remotely connected to sex, received and internalized those messages and had to deliberately train myself into believing that casual sex is perfectly fine as long as all parties involved are aware that it’s nothing but casual sex. Thus it means a lot when the person you’ve agreed to sleep with (in the context of an established relationship) up and leaves, or is in some other way no longer in that relationship with you. Even without sex, emotional intimacy is an incredibly powerful force that can be really addicting once you get a taste of it (speaking, alas, from personal experience here). At a guess that’s a human thing* more than a woman thing, but, having never been anything other than a woman I couldn’t say for certain.

    In the context of the film (which I will admit to not having seen, so my information is from the synopses on its IMDB page [cue gasps from those more cultured than I]), it seems like that scene was included as a kind of, “And too late she realized that she loved him after all!” moment, which feeds into a, “and at the end of the day all the wealth and casual sex in the world couldn’t fill the void in her heart left by the loss of the man she loved” message. I assume that’s due to the perception of women as more vulnerable to ~emotions~ than men (and, depending on your interpretation, either weaker than or better than men because of it), since you’re right that we probably wouldn’t get that scene if he’d been the mastermind in the situation instead. I’m not qualified to say whether that’s an accurate representation of that kind of situation in real life or whether it’s a narrative tool used by the film.

    Basically, I think it’s a combination of the different ways men and women [since society only recognized two genders] are socialized with regards to sex and love and intimacy and the perception of women as more emotional vulnerable than men which is transferred to media as shorthand characterization.

    And now I think I should shut up and let the grown ups talk. ~grins~

    *Though there are exceptions to every rule and making generalizations of any kind about humanity will leave at least a few people out.

  6. I’ll order the coffee, seeing as I’ve never seen Body Heat. *runs away to add to Netflix queue*

    Fashion Star looks like a trainwreck in the making. What’s the over/under on when it gets cancelled?

    • I give it one season.

      I’m OK with Jessica Simpson as a judge. I can’t help it. I have a big, old soft spot for that woman. She’s not always made the best fashion choices for herself, but she did well as a judge on the PR season 8 finale. And she does look great in that photo above. On the other hand, Nicole Ritchey? Really?

      At least there are no Kardashians. Thank the fashion gods for small favors.

  7. The whole women in love thing – I got nothing. Women & men handle emotions differently. Some of it’s nature, some nurture, that I’m sure of. Beyond that – nothing.

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