RPDR S4,E3: Glamzons vs. Champions-The Other Beeotches

It’s still a tiny enclave of folks checking in on the FBQ from time to time (which I really like); but the Queen must thank you all for the support thus far in my fledgling journey into the Blogosphere. I am humbled by each and every one of you.

Okay. Enough sentiment. Let’s tear into some Drag Queens.

Milan-Her prettiest look on the runway so far, imho. Unfortunately she still looks like Arsenio Hall in a dress to me. But the biggest critique the Queen has of her deals with the transformation from sweet, supportive sister to self-absorbed bitch. Honestly, she doesn’t have the acting chops to make the transition believable. And her performance in the infomercial would have put her 8X10 glossy in the casting “OUT” pile.

Chad Michaels-You know, for all of the talk of injections and facial work issues, this bitch pulls off strikingly beautiful like no one else. I don’t know if it is brilliant game-playing on her part, or if she is really such a sweet supportive person. Whichever it is, she is a pleasure to watch–and she gave one of the strongest performances during the challenge.

Willam-This diva fascinates me. Relentlessly ambitious and focused, it’s no wonder the other lady boys are intimidated and even angered by him. Bluntly unapologetic about his goals and aspirations, and bitingly funny–he does what he needs to to advance in the competition. No more. No less. Willam–since you’ve been kind enough to grace this Old Queen’s humble blog with your presence a couple of times, allow this middle-aged monarch to offer a tiny bit of advice: PLEASE make sure you’re enjoying what you’re doing. The money is GREAT, but trust me, it really won’t mean that much if you look back on meaningless experiences. If you ARE having the time of your life–then fuck the other bitches. Keep ’em guessing!

Phi Phi O’Hara-For all of the revelations about the bullying he withstood as a child, it seems that what Phi Phi took away from the experiences was bitter defensiveness. This is understandable and lamentable. However it is not very attractive. And even less so when the queen in question is blissfully unaware of her shortcomings and how she is perceived. I think there is a lot of talent there–and even a good spirit. If she could get all the ugliness out of the way, she would be extremely beautiful inside and out.

Madame LaQueer-Not the fiercest outfit on the runway. But the Queen appreciates the fact that this mujer gorda is proud of her curves and knows how to accent them. I think this diva could do well if she breaks out of her box and finds some versatility in her professionally done, but predictable looks. All the foolish queens who trashed her performance in the WTF competition need to take a lesson from her innate understanding of physical comedy. And Madame needs to translate that knowledge to her actual drag.

Jiggly Caliente-The Queen is still reeling from his late revelation of Ms. Caliente’s age. 30 YEARS OLD! No disrespect intended, but it would seem to me that she could really benefit from some therapy to discover what caused this seemingly arrested development and lack of self-esteem. What a joy she would be if she acted her age and not her shoe size. As stereotypical as her gorda geisha was, it showed some real understanding of character and timing.

Kenya Michaels-Ever since the Mean Girls incident last week, this pint-sized perra has left a bad taste in this FBQ’s mouth (get your minds out of the gutter Miss Things). The Queen still finds her natural beauty amazing, and grants you that she takes risks as a performer. Unfortunately her wild energy and inability to embody the nuances in American culture make her less likely in my mind to go all the way to the top.

Latrice Royale-In his initial assessment of the dolls, the Queen predicted that Latrice Royale would be more interesting OUT of drag than in. I would like to slightly amend that statement by saying that Ms. Latrice has become more interesting–not out of drag, but–off the RUNWAY than on. While creating very professional looks, she doesn’t really take risks on the runway or in performance. She tends to err on the side of pretty when she takes the stage. It’s her fiercely nurturing instincts and strong presence in the workroom and lounge that have endeared her to the masses. I definitely think she could have a shot at the whole shebang if she steps up the drag portion of her wonderful personae.

Dida Ritz-GIRLFRIEND. TORE. UP. THAT. STAGE. Her performance was, to quote Latrice: “High Drag.” Had that performance taken place in a club, Ms. Ritz would have gone home with a fortune in one-dollar bills.
Here’s where the Queen is going to lose points. Other than that unforgettable performance, I still see a boy in a dress. Granted, I see a fabulously TALENTED boy in a dress, but, nevertheless a boy. The more I watch this show, and talk with Bianca, the more I understand what an art form Gender Illusion is. Hair and makeup are only about %10 of the equation. The rest is doing your best to communicate the exquisite essence and mystique that is a woman. And since as men we will never fully understand what that is, it means becoming a magician in the art of sleight-of-hand and distraction. If young Miss Dida can sit down and objectively dissect what made her performance stellar, and–most importantly–understand how to repeat it, then she will be a force with which to be reckoned. Otherwise it just becomes a fluke based on adrenaline and desire, which becomes a nice memory and nothing more.

Okay you stalwart divas in your own right: Thoughts? Feelings? Agreement? Disagreement? Take to the Runway!!!

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2 thoughts on “RPDR S4,E3: Glamzons vs. Champions-The Other Beeotches

  1. both times when i won this episode they cut to me sitting stone faced still and that’s because i was wanting to stay poised for the camera. it ended up making me look stoic and confused especially with the music used to underscore. but a win’s a win and i had lots of fun and made what i expect are to be life long friends outta most of the girls.

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