FBQ Musings: If the Republican Presidential Candidates Were Gay: Ron Paul

With a dispute over the Maine Caucuses, the feisty septuagenarian continues to battle it out for the GOP nomination. Like the straw poll in Maine, the kind of queer Mr. Paul would become if transformed by the Gay Fairy, is a close call. The Queen is going to go with Chicken Hawk.
While the true definition of a Chicken Hawk would be an older gentleman (the Hawk) who prefers younger partners (the chickens)–in Representative Paul’s case, it would seem that it’s the chickens chasing the Big Bird. Consistently besting his opponents with a higher percentage of the Republican Youth vote, our pragmatic gay version would always have his hand on the…pulse of what is important to the “Millennials.”

Armed with what would seem to be a radical approach among his fellow candidates: thoughtful intelligence; Rugged Ron would enter rallies with hunky Log Cabin Republicans touting signs saying “Poofs for Paul.” It seems to the Queen that the gay version of Ron Paul would bear a striking resemblance to the straight version…only FIERCER.


5 thoughts on “FBQ Musings: If the Republican Presidential Candidates Were Gay: Ron Paul

  1. My 25 Year old son thinks all of the Republican candidates this time are major loony tunes with this one exception so you may be on to something here. Of course he campaigned for Obama in the last election and he is still committed to his reelection so I don’t think Paul is going to capture enough of the youth vote to make a difference.

    You should thing about theme songs for these clowns. I don’t think I can stand another chorus of Eye of the Tiger.

    • I’m so blown away and humbled by young people getting involved in the world in such a noticeable way. Even if I don’t necessarily agree with every cause, I am just so grateful that so many want to take up the mantle of social change.

      Theme songs! What a great idea for a post! This will be FUN!

  2. The son is the political activist of his generation. His sister is married to a Marine and in medical school so we can argue argue 4 corners in a circular room at the drop of the hat. Their Dad would be so proud of them. They get it honestly. He was a Social Sciences Teacher before becoming a Principal.

    The son took me to brunch yesterday and he spent an hour trying to explain primary politics to me and I spent an hour trying to explain how a series of stupid discussions put a 450 million ship on the rocks off the Italian coastline (with diagrams). He always forgets I’m an engineer until he can’t figure out how the ship falls over on its side instead of sinking or he’s trying to install a ceiling fan.

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